Many individuals who wish to make a difference in their life, and possibly even the world, tend to reach this realization – you can’t truly control your life.
We all know how much we want to be in control. We want to own our destiny, to decide, just like Neo in The Matrix – that we are in control of our destiny, not some distant oracle. But then, life happens.
We work so hard to achieve our goals, only to find ourselves stuck in a rut. We seem to do everything that’s necessary in order to achieve our goals and dreams:
We get up early, we sleep well, we eat well, we work every day towards our dreams.
But, we don’t seem to make the progress we feel we should be making.
What’s worse, we feel like other individuals, who may not put as much work as we do, are doing far better than us.
Is that fair? Don’t the laws of the universe clearly dictate that those who put in effort will reap what they sow?
It’s a little more complicated than that.
Truth is, there is so much that is out of our control, actually, most of the things that happen in our life, are not within our control.
It’s quite a frightening thought for a control freak such as myself to grasp, but it’s true nonetheless.
“Control what you can control. Don’t lose sleep worrying about things that you don’t have control over because, at the end of the day, you still won’t have any control over them.” – Cam Newton
Luckily, while researching about lucid dreams, I’ve reached a sudden epiphany.
It was said about lucid dreaming, that when you get to the point that you realize that you are in a dream, you mustn’t try to control the dream – e.g: grow wings and fly, but rather guide it slowly and surely into where you want it.
That is, you can’t just blink and start flying, but rather think in that direction.
You will, most likely, eventually achieve the ability to fly in your dream, but you mustn’t rush it. You must slowly guide your dream to that point. It requires patience and the understanding that some things, most things (even lucid dreams), are not completely within our control, far from it.
So, what do we do? how can we Guide life, instead of Trying to control life?
Well, it starts with what you CAN control – how you perceive things that happen to you.
Things will happen, but none of these things that will happen to you are inherently good or bad.
YOU are the one who decides whether things are good or bad. It is entirely dependent on your perception of life.
There is no “objective” life, only the subjective reality that is made by your unique perception of the world.
When you control your perception of the world, it becomes much easier to persevere, even when faced with difficulty and hardship.
To make myself clear, I’m not saying – “stop working on your goals, it’s meaningless, most of the things aren’t in your control anyway”.
On the contrary, I’m saying – DO THAT!
But also remember, that when you don’t reach your desired results as quickly as you’ve anticipated, that there are many things that are not under your complete control, including life itself.
So don’t sweat it trying to Control your life.
Instead, take a deep breath, smile and start Guiding your life, steering it wisely into the harbor of your destination.